Wildflower

I need more joy. I need more happiness. I need something to make me see that this world isn't all cloud and rain.
In this life there are two determining factors. Will you live or will you die? Will you rise to the surface or will you allow yourself to sink like a stone to the bottom of the lake, rest in the silt below the happy kicking feet of children swimming in the summer? There are, at times, moments when we want to do both, or either one. There are days when we feel on top of the world, others when we're so downtrodden that it feels like the very boots of humanity are pressing us down into the dirt. It's all we can do just to pull ourselves back up again and begin another day.
What I'm trying to say here is that in my adventures in depression I have felt things I never expected, and being so completely confused and in dismay, I don't know what I'm going to do next.